#CollectiveCare 👩‍👩‍👧‍👧 As Women’s History Month comes to an end, let’s reflect on what ‘Intersectional Feminism’ means to us

It goes without saying that in light of current global events, many of us are currently collectively immersed in uncomfortable but transformative processes of reconsidering and reimagining our values. We thus feel compelled, as we approach the end of Women’s History Month, to do some reflection, through our Intersectional Feminist lens, to hold ourselves accountable and grounded as we navigate this difficult time.

And in the spirit of our ongoing efforts to decenter the colonizer calendar, we wish a happy new year to all who observe Nowruz and the Persian solar calendar, or the Spring Equinox. What better time to embrace new beginnings, leave behind things that do not serve us, and reflect on our values?

One way we can take action on this is by critically reflecting on how we show up in our movements. 

Holding ourselves accountable to constantly evolve, and do better, while also being kind to ourselves, will help us sustain ourselves for the long-run, and make sure all our relatives feel welcome, safe, and heard while fighting alongside us. 

Any interpretation of ‘Feminism’ that excludes intersectional identities is counterproductive to our fundamental goals of promoting gender equity in a way that leaves nobody behind. Though we support all our straight, cisgender, White sisters from the Global Minority, Feminism is not just about them! Our Movement would be nothing without the Black and brown, trans, nonbinary, disabled, Indigenous women from the Global Majority - let’s put some respect on their names and legacies.

The reality is we Feminists sometimes can, and do, perpetuate misogynistic, patriarchal, anti-Feminist values ourselves. Being of a certain identity or Movement does not absolve us from the responsibility of unlearning and challenging internalized, harmful behaviors, whether we do them intentionally or not. 

This weekend, we practice Collective Care through reflecting on ourselves as individuals as well as part of our communities, acknowledging harmful narratives that keep us divided instead of united - which makes it easier for the *cishet patriarchy to control and dominate over us, hurting our movement!

[*Cishet men/patriarchy = Cisgender and heterosexual men, and the system of patriarchy, from which they benefit most from. As with all identities, all individuals’ with this identity might hold intersecting identities that affect their levels of privilege and power in any given situation. ‘Cishet’ men are referred to in this blog post to highlight this specific group’s current dominance in social/political dynamics of privilege and power, in terms of gender and sexuality, making their experiences different to those who are marginalized based on gender and sexuality.]

How might I, even as a woman or gender-marginalized person myself, be contributing to upholding the un-Feminist, cishet, misogynistic, and patriarchal status quo by…

• …promoting ageism, fatphobia, body shaming, comparison, and diet shaming (things that are historically rooted in oppressive rhetoric, such as anti-Blackness)? These behaviors do not just come in the form of overt bullying! They can also look like: Constantly commenting on your own, or others’, bodies, even if it is in a seemingly positive or neutral manner, in a way that makes others feel insecure; the question, “are you really going to eat all that?”; inconsiderate discussions and promotion of diet, fitness, and cosmetic surgery culture; and seeing value in others exclusively based on appearance.

• …excluding or neglecting the narratives of trans and nonbinary people in my activism (e.g. by invalidating the womanhood of trans women)?

• …refusing or neglecting to acknowledge that I hold certain identity labels that privilege me over other women or gender-marginalized people, and failing to practice deference? Some examples of identities one might have, along with being a ‘woman,’ that add nuance and inequity regarding one’s experience with ‘womanhood’ might include: Being cisgender/straight; having socioeconomic privilege; being ‘able bodied’ and ‘neurotypical;’ being White, conforming to ‘conventional’ standards of beauty (even as non-White people); being ‘too loud;’ being ‘too quiet;’ and/or being seen as ‘palatable,’ ‘eloquent,’ ‘sexy,’ or ‘acceptable’ in ways approved by the patriarchy.

• …placing unfair judgment onto those who have not had the same experiential, educational or financial opportunities as me for being less knowledgeable about certain issues, including regarding Feminism? Feminism must include recognition of class struggle and privilege! Just because someone is less educated about Feminist liberation does not make them less of a Feminist, and they deserve to be kindly educated (as long as they are also committed to learning, and as long as the education is done by someone with the time, resources, sense of safety, and emotional bandwidth to do so).

  

  How might I, even as a woman or gender-marginalized person myself, be (intentionally or unintentionally) causing harm by…

• …centering cishet patriarchy in my life, by putting its needs, requests, and desires above those of others?

• …disproportionately subscribing to value systems dictated by cishet men, such as capitalist financial wealth, historically cishet-man-dominated career milestones, and ‘male validation?’

• …demonstrating bias (e.g. am I treating cishet men with more warmth and respect than I do for women and other gender-marginalized people)?

• …talking over, taking up space over, or interrupting women and other gender-marginalized people?

• …engaging in divisive, destructive, and unnecessary competition with other women? Do I perpetuate behavior that tears down other women when they succeed or receive recognition? If so, how can I adopt more uplifting behaviours, and transformatively heal from my personal insecurities and internalized misogyny?

• …disproportionately centering discussions about, and service towards, cishet men in my conversations with other women and gender-marginalized peoples? Is this taking time and energy away from much-needed discussions we could be having about our feelings, careers, needs, love, and other topics related to our liberation?

• …performing for the cishet ‘Male Gaze’ in ways that harm others? How does this affect my personal dignity, and how might this be taking opportunities away from others who do not have the same abilities as me to perform for the ‘Male Gaze?’

• …performing ‘toxic masculinity,’ binary gender roles, patriarchy, or misogyny? For example, some queer women might sometimes perpetuate and project unwanted and hurtful binary gender roles and ‘toxic masculinity’ onto their partners - how can we move away from this as a collective?

• …stigmatizing emotional awareness and contributing to emotional invalidation of others? How can we make ourselves safe spaces for others’, as well as our own, emotional expression? Also - stigmatising emotional awareness harms everybody, including men (this is why we say Feminism is for everyone)!

  

  
  
  
  

  How can I take proactive measures to make my Intersectional Feminist work even kinder, more impactful, and transformative, in terms of…

• …listening and empathizing when other women and gender-marginalized peoples are speaking about their experiences?

• …educating myself about Intersectional Feminist issues outside of issues that affect me?

• …decentering cishet, White, Global Minority Feminist narratives, making an effort where possible to explore other global narratives?

• …making an effort to speak up and act in situations of injustice against women and other gender-marginalized peoples, especially when I have the privilege to do so?

• …raising younger generations with principled Intersectional Feminist values, and leading by example? Am I raising my sons to understand their privileges? How do I kindly and gently train them to have Feminist values in age-appropriate ways? Am I frequently talking negatively about my own body in front of impressionable young people, or commenting frequently on young people’s bodies? If so, how can I heal, and avoid passing on negative self talk onto others? And am I imposing the gender binary onto my children before they are of the age to make their own decisions regarding their gender expression and identity? If so, how can I create a safer environment for them to explore who they are while avoiding projecting harmful norms onto them?

• …making time and putting in effort into my relationships with women, girls and other gender-marginalized folks in my life, such as my mother, friends, sisters, colleagues, and other community members?

• …working to actively boycott industries that perpetuate gender inequity, and put my money where my mouth is by (practically and financially) supporting Feminist Movements and endeavors?

  

  It’s also worth mentioning that while it is important and powerful to be vulnerable, hold ourselves accountable, and get (un)comfortable as part of driving forward progress, let’s remember to also be kind to ourselves and channel our reflections into acceptance and change, instead of guilt and shame. Read more on this topic in our previous blog post on accountability and repair! As Queer Salvadoran Transformative Justice community organizer Amanda Aguilar Shank writes in her chapter of the book Beyond Survival: Strategies and Stories from the Transformative Justice Movement, “...interpersonal harm is a basic fact of human reality. We can’t avoid being harmed and harming others.” 

  
  

  Though we must work to avoid, and heal from, doing and experiencing harm, let’s also remember we are imperfect humans doing our best to heal deep, complex, intergenerational structural, and systemic wounds. We cannot, and should not, try to fix everything all at once. Every time we take on disproportionate levels of guilt and shame for honest mistakes and/or avoid accountability, we give our power straight back to the inequitable system, and slow down our collective liberation. 

  
  

  We cannot, and should not, place all the burden, guilt, and shame for all of society’s pain on ourselves. This is work for the collective!

  

  

  

  Resources

• Amanda Aguilar Shank, “2: Beyond Firing: How do we create community-wide accountability for sexual harassment in our movements?,” in Beyond Survival: Strategies and Stories from the Transformative Justice Movement, eds. Ejeris Dixon and Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha (AK Press, 2020).

  
  

  #WeAreManushyan ♾️ Equal Human Beings 

  
  

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